I Think I’m Over It

You are never going to believe this. This weekend I went to the Beyonce and Jay Z concert at the Rosebowl in LA (more on this to come).
I went with a couple girlfriends and the way they have it setup is that you can park there on the golf course and tailgate for a few hours before the concert starts. 
As we were walking towards the stadium out of NOWHERE I saw Ryan standing there by his car. I mean out of 60,000 people how in the world was I going to run into him?!?! Just insane…

I noticed right away that he was there with a girl. And it just so happens as we walked by, this girl he was with immediately complimented our outfits. And with that…Ryan spotted me. We looked at each other at the same time and he shouted “Tess!”

I acted like I was surprised to see him. Even though I had spotted him first 10 seconds before. haha So my friends and I walked over to him and the FIRST thing out of his mouth was “Hi! This is my friend I’m here with. Not my girlfriend. Just want to say that right off the bat.” and I was like Okaaaaay. Then he told me that he had JUST been talking about me to her. 

My friends started chatting with his girl space friend while Ryan and I were off to the side chatting. He told me I looked good. And I replied, “I know right? Your loss. You fucked up, idiot.” 

Just kidding I didnt say that.

We talked for like 5 more minutes about random stuff. And that was it.

I walked away from that moment feeling super weirded out that I saw him, happy that I saw him when I did look good, and also realizing out of all the emotions I was going through, that not one of them was giddiness or butterflies.

So with that… I realized I’m over it. I havent seen him face to face in over 2 months and being around him again I felt uncomfortable and uneasy. Not because of the situation…but it just reminded me how he makes me feel.

It was silly of me to be on such a high after dating him for just a month… but I was seriously on a HIGH with him at first. I thought I had finally found the one…that finally someone liked me for me and it was going to be perfect and fast moving. And when he stopped everything between us for no reason, I came crashing down hard from that high. And it hurt.

Now I feel like I will never be able to see him in that same light again as before. 

He was texting me that night and the next morning. Saying it was really nice to see me. And he told me that his girl space friend thought I was cute. And I replied “haha oh really? yay”

Well he didnt like that very much because I havent heard from him since. But I’m just really not in the mood to talk to him or entertain his texts. I’m over it.